It's chicken and egg. Which came first, the guilt or the anger? Not clear? What is clear is that when you oscillate between these two states, you massively lose energy. And you also get majorly bummed. 

It goes like this. Let's say you notice you're feeling guilty. You're attacking yourself for some error. But then you start to feel that your feeling guilty is completely unjustified. And you get angry.

But when you step back, you notice that you actually started feeling guilty in the first place for having gotten angry.

Self-attack followed— you saw yourself in the wrong—and then came indignation that you should be the one feeling guilty! After all, wasn't it this person or that person who made you angry in the first place! 

It's not a way to live and you know it. But in the middle of it you feel stuck and at the same time out of control.

There is a way out of this energy-depleting process but the solution is so different from conventional advice it’s going to make you laugh!

Here is the solution.

1.  When you catch yourself doing the pattern, begin laughing. Force it a little if you have to: start with a fake smile if you can’t quite laugh at first. But keep going till you laugh hard out loud.
2.  Remember the last time you indulged in this cycle and truly see the humor in it.
3.  Memorize the sequence of behaviors that led you to the cycle and say aloud to yourself: I did all this because I wanted to feel bad. And I wanted to feel bad because I didn’t want to take responsibility for not yet being perfect. And if I felt bad about some imperfection in my behavior I could at least point to my feeling bad about it as evidence that I must really not be a bad person because though I was imperfect, at least I felt bad about it!!
4. Then laugh your head off about how utterly ludicrous this is.
5. Final step. Then make a deal with yourself that though you won’t tell anyone you did this, you are swearing off being perfect forever and settling in the future for merely noticing what you did that was less than ideal and thinking of some way you might do it differently the next time.
6. Laugh some more. Then tell yourself you are one cool and cunning person to outsmart the guilt and anger whipsaw!